From Control Freak to Jesus Freak

"The sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God. You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you." Romans 8:7-9 (NIV)

I have spent years as a "control freak." Not the derogatory version that you find in the encyclopedia that describes someone who wishes to control others through a feeling of superiority, but the quiet kind who likes to control every aspect of their own life. Everything that I did, owned, or had any control over was subject to my nature. It gave me a sense of personal fulfillment to think that I had a little "control" of my life. Of course, this was all an illusion. I never did have control, I just had God's providence helping me to fulfill His will for my life. I still fight my controlling tendencies to this day-the desire to keep a constantly clean house (this one faded as soon as I got married and had a husband, 2 boys and 2 dogs to contend with), the desire to maintain a balanced checkbook, to be in charge at work, and the list goes on. It is not that God doesn't was me to have a clean house, or a balanced checkbook, He just doesn't want me to lose my sense of priorities in my life. When we forget who we are living for, we will soon find out who is really in control. God let me be "in control" for a while, but one day in a single instant He decided to teach me the lesson that I really had no control and He was in charge and it was time for me to admit it. I drove in to work gainfully employed and drove away from the office for the last time with my car filled with all the personal belongings I had accumulated there for over 9 years. My life was forever changed and it was then that I knew it was God who was in control and not me. He used that hardship to change me and the way I operated my life. We officially turned everything over to seek God's will for our lives, our livelihood, our minds and our whole hearts. Who knew that a traumatic hardship could turn into such a blessing? God did.

I am now officially a "Jesus Freak." I am totally sold out to letting God be in control. Who better to be in control that the Creator of the universe? John 1:2 says about Jesus "He was with God in the beginning" and "in him was life, and that life was the light of men." (v.4) He has truly changed my life. I don't mean the initial conversion experience when you first come to accept Jesus as your Savior, but the true relinquishing of control and the peace that surpasses all understanding (Phil. 4:7) that comes when you let God be God and you follow His will and not your own. It is a truly indescribable feeling to know that once you lay it down, God will pick it up and run it in for a touchdown. But you must remember that all things are for His glory and honor in our lives, for it is through Him that we are truly successful. Keep your motives and priorities in order so that they may glorify Him. Jesus said "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." (Matt 5:8) I can't wait to see God, but while I am here I will try to do my best to live for Him and let Him be in control.